Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Must not joke about women

I am by no means a hardcore feminist, but I came across a status while browsing the homepage of my Facebook the other day that really bothered me: “Dating a woman with a child is like playing on someone else’s saved file.” [of a computer game]

Whereas it is obviously meant to be a joke, this statement is disturbing on a number of levels.

First off, comparing a single mother to a video game demonstrates a depersonalization of women. It seems to be saying that women are only there for men’s entertainment- to be played with and ultimately discarded as men please.

Second, it classifies single mothers as both used and undesirable.

Third, it expresses a total disregard for the child. This joke seems to be saying that because the child is not your own “achievement,” it is somehow meaningless.



Anonymous said...

This is disgusting.
I personally rescued a woman with two small children from a bad marriage. We have been married for 52 years now.

Anonymous said...

Don't be an idiot!

Let them post such things, let them say such things and keep your mouth closed. Not because you agree with them but so they feel free to identify themselves.

How are you to discover someone's true feelings before it's too late, except to catch such comments and act quietly on them.

In this case the women this man dates would be forewarned that this man has no intention of bonding with her children and therefore would be unsuitable as a parent.

Bird of Paradise said...

Dose that include Blond Jokes?

Anonymous said...

The writer may not be a 'hardcore feminist' (whatever the hell that means) but nor is she a gamer.
Playing someone else's file is not 'meaningless' nor is it 'used and undesirable'.
It is merely someone else's property.
I assumed it meant that stepping into someone else's 'dad' shoes messes with the input that person has already had, and plans to do in the future.

Stan B said...

Playing someone else's "save file" in this case means picking up the game they couldn't finish, and showing how it SHOULD be done....

dman said...

Anon 6:56 has it right.

There's nothing inherently derogatory in the metaphor of the "saved game" file.

To me it was merely making the comparison that when you date a woman with kids, you're arriving late to the game (if I may be permitted that turn of phrase).

It’s not reducing women to entertainment, but rather pointing out that even though you had no influence or control of any earlier events in their life, you will reap the benefits and consequences. You’re simply stepping in to a “life already in progress.”

Truth be told, the same is true for *any* relationship, but in the case of a dating a single parent (note I said "parent," not "mom") the child is an additional factor in the relationship. If you don’t like the man/woman, you simply don’t date him/her. But if you love him/her, their child (and possibly the child’s biological mother/father) can have a significant influence on your future happiness.

A child is not necessarily a negative factor, but like it or not, he/she is an *additional* one.

Alpha Skua said...

Q. What do you get when yuou cross a liberal with a crash test dummy? A. Not much diffrence